The Prepostion "At"
In the English language, the preposition "at" is a very important word. It's a tiny word, only two letters. However, it carries much weight. Let's look at two examples:
"Sinless is at a swingers club."
This is much different than:
"Sinless is a swingers club."
It's a small difference, but a vital one. Sinless parties happen inside a swingers club, but it is NOT a swingers party. It is a fetish and BDSM party. This seems to be a very difficult concept for Czech people. I understand that commercialism is not a strong point in recent Czech history. It's true that if you have a potraviny, you name it "potraviny." And if the sign says "library" then it is a library. However, in this case the sign says "swingers" but it is a fetish party.
It makes perfect sense to me. Many fetish parties all over the world do this. And there is a very good reason for it: you cannot make a decent living off of being a fetish club owner. Very few people have built and successfully maintained their own fetish dungeons without having other income on the side. Thus, we fetish organizers live in the rental world. Fetish Party People in Goteborg, Sweden is one of my favorite spots to play. They share a space with a swingers night AND a gay night. Each organization takes turns throughout the month having their different parties there. German Fetish Ball has "couples only" play parties that are in lounges, bars, and residences. Fetish Grand Prix Brno is in a hotel. Does that mean FGP is a hotel? Of course not.
Sinless is in a swingers club, but it is NOT a swingers party. I rent the space. I like it there. It is luxurious and comfortable. The owners are open and understanding of sexual fetishes. And they even have their own St. Andrew's cross on the wall.
So why is it that I keep hearing about so-called fetishists that are afraid to come to Sinless because they think it's a swingers party? To me, that's shocking. In my mind, a fetishist is someone who has already broken the standard barriers of "should" and "shouldn't." A fetishist is someone who is unafraid of the different and the new. But if something as trivial as the location of the event is stopping one from exploring their fetish world, then I suppose they will miss all the wonders that Sinless has to offer...
Labels: bdsm, cross, D/s, fetish, fetish grand prix, fetish party, fgp, goth, kinky, master, prague, praha, servant, sex, sin, sinless, slave, spanking
posted by The Revelator at 13:31
5 Comments:
I am ashamed to admit that it never dawned on me, the whole "'potraviny' = protraviny, thus 'swingers club' = club full of swingers." Lucky for all of us SINLESS parties aren't held in a day care center.
To be fair, I don't think this impression that you are a swingers club is helped by your door policy. Your website says: "In the tradition of other international play parties...single men are not allowed into the club". I now live in Prague, having been in the London Fetish scene for years and a regular at clubs like Torture Garden, Club Rub and Club Flesh. At all of these I've been let in on my own or with other guys.
You may ask "Can't you fid a girl to bring with you?" Well, my girlfriend is very vanilla and isn't ready to go yet, and I don't have any female friends here into fet. I don't want to find some random girl to come with, apart from the GF probably not being comfortable with that that would make me feel like a swinger :) The one person I would come with is a male friend, also a regular of the London scene. We'd love to come down, dress up, drink some cocktails and meet some of the local scenesters, but your door policy puts us off. Surely exceptions can be made for those that make the effort to dress up and know and understand the rules?
I understand why they dont let single males in. Its a fetish play party. Even Torture Garden often has a "couples room" to keep out the guys following you around there. (though it doesn't really work) Nothing is worse than a bunch of horny guys staring at you and wanking off right next to you, while you and your partner while you are trying to get into a scene together. I love TG, but even there it gets scary sometimes.
Hey Charlie, thanks for writing. You have a good point. The single male rule is one that I have thought a lot about. It is a difficult topic.
First I want to say: you have compared Sinless to such great globally famous parties like Torture Garden. Thanks! I'm flattered! I have been to parties in many places, London included, and I have seen a distinct difference between a fetish party and a fetish play party. (As "Anonymous" has pointed out) Many play parties are for couples only, as the focus is on action and scene play. Open fetish parties are generally more social, with the focus being to dress up in kinky clothing, dance and meet people. Sinless is more about action, so I decided to go with the couples only route.
In addition, we must consider the state of the Czech Republic today. In my 6 years living in Prague, I have seen and experienced a culture that is still very young in it's sexual development. (or perhaps, "deviancy" is a better word) This will sound harsh, but: I don't feel Czechs are fully, 100% ready for this kind of scene yet. Some people really understand, but most Czech fetishists have their own definition of a "fetish club" - which is a place to sit and eat while wearing latex. There is nothing wrong with that at all, but once real play and sexuality is involved, they get confused, and classify it as being part of the sex industry and call it a brothel, or a swingers party.
And as for the non-fetish Czechs, well...I have created clubs in other places where the cultural environment was similar and it turned into a circus full of sexual tourists coming to watch the "freaks" or even worse - aggressively expecting something that is simply not sold.
All that said, I do have a VIP list for single males. Exceptions do happen. Contact me at revelator@sinless.cz for more details.
To be fair, you make a good distinction between fetish party and fetish play party. I have to admit that my main aim when I go out to a fet night is to dress up, chat, enjoy a good show and, if I meet someone I might want to play with, then it's a bonus. If the main aim of the night is play first in a fun and safe environment, then I can fully understand why you make it couples only.
And yes Anon, I've not been oblivious to those guys, it seems that the downside of a party being done well and becoming popular is attracting these beastly little monkeys who can't wait to get their chap out wherever they are.
So yes, Revelator, with your summing up of the scene over here, I understand why you would make it couples, sounds like experience has warned against otherwise. Thanks for the email, I'll drop you a line if we want to pop down (might have to do some shopping, Czech beer and food has had quite a dramatic effect, and latex only stretches so far :)
CB
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